3 and a half year age gap relationship problems

3 and a half year age gap relationship problems

I was born in and have two older siblings. So far, so normal. Except for the fact that being born in – the same year the Titanic went. Studies have found partners with more than a ten-year gap in age But when it comes to our own relationships, both men and women prefer for age-gap couples seem to reside not in problems within the couple, but in. For rule-related involvement (e.g., relationships), year-old men are stating that The minimum rule (half-your-age-plus-seven) seems to work for men, Figure 3: Female Participants' Minimum Preferred Partner Age as Compared to the Rule but the gap between reports of what is socially acceptable and the rule itself.

At the time I was headstrong and eager to speed life up. Out of school only one year, I'd started an accountancy course. It's probably no coincidence that I was also hunting for a mortgage at the same time and looking for a husband. I had a doll's house mindset. The thought of living alone made me nervous, and setting up a home seemed the most practical way of avoiding this.

My husband was a successful designer, had worked overseas and was thinking of retirement. We got on very well, had similar interests and senses of humour. I became pregnant almost immediately. There were eyes raised at the beginning of our relationship; an expectation from people that I was "chosen" for youth and looks.

But we've been together over 20 years now, and our age difference is now rarely mentioned. There have, however, been pros and cons to our situation. When I was young I tended to hang on his word — he is clever and has had a lot of life experience. But as I matured, tensions sometimes set in.

3 and a half year age gap relationship problems

I developed my own opinions and became less willing to be lectured or talked down to. I also gave up education to parent our children: This is partly to do with insecurity; he has mentioned being worried that I will find a "younger model" to replace him with. One day, I'll have to think about health issues — in fact, I do wonder about how I would perform as his carer — but so far he's had amazing health.

But there are a lot of pros, too. There was never any issue about commitment. My husband had already lived a pretty full life — if men have biological clocks, his was definitely ticking. He is a very devoted and dependable father; his maturity really came into its own when he became a dad.

Dr. Drew on dealing with a dating age gap

We've worked very well as parents, planning and agreeing on courses of action, giving the children a strong framework. The fact that he had a steady income and a house relieved much of the pressure young couples must feel when they become parents. Although it may not have been my wisest choice to settle down so young, I feel I've gained in having a partner who carries with him so much life experience and fullness of character.

I'm 34 and he has just turned 50 — a gaping chasm of 16 years.

Large age gaps in a relationship: our readers respond | The people's panel | Opinion | The Guardian

In the past I have generally dated men my age or younger, so this sudden leap into the world of "the older man" was a life change for me, and what a splendid one it has proved to be. Our cultural references may be a bit different, but that's the only thing highlighting our age gap. We laugh at the same things and have similar hobbies, and yes, I find him very attractive indeed. He might not be able to do the splits as well as he used to allegedly or stay up very late week nights, but who gives a damn?

3 and a half year age gap relationship problems

I remember my dear old grandma saying on the morning of her 85th birthday that she still felt 21 inside, and I think this is something people forget when denouncing couples with an age gap.

We're all youngsters inside. Yes, that would be lovely thanks. So they are attuned to looking for a partner who will also invest resources into a relationship and family. This is probably because women place more importance on resources and men on fertility.

3 and a half year age gap relationship problems

For this, socio-cultural explanations might provide insights. With more women working, in higher positions and being paid more, they no longer have such a reliance on men for resources. So fewer women will prioritise resources when looking for a mate. Some suggest a lack ofor a reduced pool of, suitable age-similar mates may bring about same-sex coupling with large age differences. What are the relationship outcomes for age-gap couples?

Many people assume that age-gap couples fare poorly when it comes to relationship outcomes. But some studies find the relationship satisfaction reported by age-gap couples is higher.

Large age gaps in a relationship: our readers respond

These couples also seem to report greater trust and commitment and lower jealousy than similar-age couples. Over three-quarters of couples where younger women are partnered with older men report satisfying romantic relationships. That is, if people in age-gap couples believe their family, friends and wider community disapprove of their union, then relationship commitment decreases and the risk of break-up increases.

These effects appear to apply to heterosexual and same-sex couples. So the negative outcomes for age-gap couples seem to reside not in problems within the couple, but in pressures and judgments from the outside world.

Why couples with big age gaps are happier, despite the social disapproval

Another factor at play may have to do with the stage of life each partner is experiencing. For instance, a ten-year gap between a year-old and a year-old may bring up different challenges and issues than for a ten-year gap where one partner is 53 and the other is This is because our lives are made up of different stages, and each stage consists of particular life tasks we need to master.

And we give priority to the mastery of different tasks during these distinct stages of our lives.